Sometimes there really isn't anything you can do to solve the problem
Woahh, didn't realise that the last time I blogged was about a month ago. I'm surprised that there are still like two people reading this blog... Anyway, I guess I really lost the mojo to blog, to update people about my life in Melbourne, to even post up pictures one by one and describe them.
Life... has really been mundane thus far. It's very, very sad/depressing waking up everyday without a purpose in life, without any form of motivation or urge of any sort. It's a waste to see time goes by just like that - so uneventful.
Things have been so uneventful that I do not even know where to start - I often wonder to myself when I am feeling extremely lonely if I actually made the right decision to return to Melbourne when times are these tough. Was the "PR" this important that I had to jump on the bandwagon with about 12,093,467 (haha) others returning to Australia upon graduating? Had I stayed back, I would've already been working now, probably slaving myself away in some auditing firm or some sort, working from 8am-3am everysingleday. On the up side, I could still rely on my parents because I have a home there and there was not a need to pay for rent, I could move about freely because we had cars at home, I could meet up with friends anytime and best of all, I could be with my family everyday. On the other hand, by paying $2105 and subsequently staying here in Melbourne, I am risking everything - my chances of getting employed like right now, my family, money and oh-so-glorious food... At the end of the day, is it even worth my time and life?
But what is life without risk? Without struggles? Without hardships? What is life staying at home being spoon-fed by your parents and not experiencing something in this big, bad world? My father and a friend both mentioned that I am indeed being very brave, taking this tough route in life. Ultimately, I have no one to blame but myself for taking this route (especially during this hard time). It has been three and a half months since graduating and I am still bumming around. The idealogy of people back home is that I am being so pathetic -I cannot even find myself a job and I am merely wasting my parents' money. But hey, who the fuck are they to even judge me and my decisions when they do not know how I truly feel deep down?
I am thankful I have my parents' support and love to go through this, they have never once rushed me to get employed, neither have they been pressuring me on why I am still unemployed. I am lucky there are friends out there who understand the position I am in right now. Once and for all, I hope people would stop asking me if I am working already or not, because the answer is no. And why the fuck should you care?
I tell myself that once you make a big decision, you have to stick with it, and pull yourself through the hardships. You have to pave a way for your own future in order to succeed, and you have to be strong enduring such tough times. So why still do it when you knew it wasn't going to be easy?
Because you only live once - you cannot afford to regret.
Life... has really been mundane thus far. It's very, very sad/depressing waking up everyday without a purpose in life, without any form of motivation or urge of any sort. It's a waste to see time goes by just like that - so uneventful.
Things have been so uneventful that I do not even know where to start - I often wonder to myself when I am feeling extremely lonely if I actually made the right decision to return to Melbourne when times are these tough. Was the "PR" this important that I had to jump on the bandwagon with about 12,093,467 (haha) others returning to Australia upon graduating? Had I stayed back, I would've already been working now, probably slaving myself away in some auditing firm or some sort, working from 8am-3am everysingleday. On the up side, I could still rely on my parents because I have a home there and there was not a need to pay for rent, I could move about freely because we had cars at home, I could meet up with friends anytime and best of all, I could be with my family everyday. On the other hand, by paying $2105 and subsequently staying here in Melbourne, I am risking everything - my chances of getting employed like right now, my family, money and oh-so-glorious food... At the end of the day, is it even worth my time and life?
But what is life without risk? Without struggles? Without hardships? What is life staying at home being spoon-fed by your parents and not experiencing something in this big, bad world? My father and a friend both mentioned that I am indeed being very brave, taking this tough route in life. Ultimately, I have no one to blame but myself for taking this route (especially during this hard time). It has been three and a half months since graduating and I am still bumming around. The idealogy of people back home is that I am being so pathetic -I cannot even find myself a job and I am merely wasting my parents' money. But hey, who the fuck are they to even judge me and my decisions when they do not know how I truly feel deep down?
I am thankful I have my parents' support and love to go through this, they have never once rushed me to get employed, neither have they been pressuring me on why I am still unemployed. I am lucky there are friends out there who understand the position I am in right now. Once and for all, I hope people would stop asking me if I am working already or not, because the answer is no. And why the fuck should you care?
I tell myself that once you make a big decision, you have to stick with it, and pull yourself through the hardships. You have to pave a way for your own future in order to succeed, and you have to be strong enduring such tough times. So why still do it when you knew it wasn't going to be easy?
Because you only live once - you cannot afford to regret.
posted by Leen at
10:58 PM
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